Mental
by Miss Kells Bells
Summary: All Human AU. One day William "Spike" Pratt wakes up in an insane intuition, convinced he's a vampire. Meanwhile his girlfriend Buffy Summers is trying to comprehend how her boyfriend could do that things the police is saying.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: All Human AU. One day William "Spike" Pratt wakes up in an insane intuition, convinced he's a vampire. Meanwhile his girlfriend Buffy Summers is trying to comprehend how her boyfriend could do that things the police is saying he did and keep her life together. **  
><strong>Rating: T for some violence<strong>  
><strong>Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer.<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 1<strong>

**2002**

Spike awoke on a soft floor. He tried to stretch his arms but they were caught in something. At first he thought he was just wrapped securely in his blanket, but when he looked down he noticed a straightjacket. "Oh, you have to be bloody kidding me," he said. He stood up and pulled his arms away, but the restraints would not break. "Buffy," he yelled at the door of his padded cell, "Whatever kind of sick joke this is...cut it out!"

He was hoping Buffy would walk in through the door, wearing a sexy little nurse's outfit, and slowly untie him. Then he would pounce on her and he, the "psycho", would have his way with her. But Buffy did not walk through those doors.

"Bloody Hell," Spike shouted, "This isn't funny anymore." He tugged again at the straightjacket. He could not understand why it would not break. Didn't he have super strength?

He thought about this predicament some more. Perhaps this was more serious than he first thought. Perhaps some group, like the Initiative, had captured him. If so he was going to have to figure out a way to escape, and fast.

"Mr. Pratt." A woman with a white lab coat opened the door to the cell and walked in. Behind her were two guards. "I hope today you will come without a fight."

Spike stared at the woman. He wondered how the woman knew is former last name and why she was using it. Was it a taunt? But that, Spike realized, was the least of his problems. He had to figure out a way to escape. Even restrained he knew he was strong enough to kill the woman with no effort, and the guards wouldn't be that much harder either. The problem was the chip in his head. He if tried to hurt them it would send a flash of pain through his skull. Damn, that chip was getting inconvenient!

"Today?" Spike asked, "I don't remember us being formally introduced. And you are?" Spike nonchalantly leaned against a padded wall.

"William," the woman sighed, "We've been over this. I am Dr. Walsh, your psychiatrist."

"Psychiatrist my ass! I'll bloody kill you." Spike attempted to vamp out his face, but it wasn't working. "What have you done to me?" Spike asked mortified. First they put chip in his head that stopped him from hurting humans, now he couldn't even vamp out his face. If he couldn't at least _look_ scary there was no way he would ever successfully mug a person again.

"Hopefully your medicine has started to work," Dr. Walsh said.

Spike lunged forward. Sure the chip would give him a killer headache but it would be worth it. How dare they try to tame him! Before he reached the doctor the guards pinned him to the ground. He was surprised at how weak he felt. He could not throw the men off of him. Whatever they did to him they must had subdued his strength too.

"I'll kill you!" he yelled, "I'll kill you all!"

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><p>"Ms. Summers?" the police officer, Riley Finn, said while standing on Buffy Summers' front porch said. He was the same police officer that had taken her boyfriend, William "Spike" Pratt, away only a few nights ago.<p>

"What do you want, Finn?" she asked, not willing to cooperate.

"May I come in?"

"No!"

Finn sighed.

"It wasn't him," Buffy said, "It was the lunatic ex-girlfriend of his. This is exactly her style."

"Please, Ms. Summers, let me come in."

"You're wrong about William." Buffy had been dating Spike for only a few month but they were madly in love. And a few nights ago the police took him away and arrested. She knew he did nothing wrong and she would not allow them to continue to her harass her.

Finn stared at Buffy, waiting for her to step aside and invite him in. After a three-minute glaring match she sighed and walked into the living room. Without a formal invitation Finn walked inside and followed her into the living room.

"Your boyfriend is…not who you think he is," Finn said while taking a seat on the couch next to Buffy. He stared at her intensely. "We have the DNA proof."

"Killing people, that's why Drusilla did," Buffy said. Drusilla was Spike's ex-girlfriend who had been put in an high-security insane asylum for murder years before Buffy met Spike.

"Drusilla's been locked up for years," Finn said. "She's in an intuition. Besides there were…small differences between these killings and those."

"It wasn't William," Buffy said, "And nothing you tell me will convince me otherwise."


	2. Chapter 2

**Author Note: My goal is to update once a day until this fic is finished (should be 9 chapters). However the Hurricane Irene has really been messing with my plans. First band camp was cancelled. So I thought I had a free week and I'd be done with this before I went back to school. Now, apparently, it starts today (I'm posting in the early morning). In fact, that's why I'm posting so early, because technically it's the 30th so I'm following my one-a-day plan. But if I fall behind it's because I'm so tired from running new drills and memorizing new music. I'll be free on Saturday and my classes don't start until sometime next week so if I do fall behind it'll still be finished before the end of next week.  
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**Author Note 2: So this chapter is a flashback about Spike's past. I had a lot of fun writing Drusilla's dialogue and I hope I did her justice. She's one of my favorite characters to write for so let me know if she sounds in character and if there is anything I should improve on. I hope you like this chapter (and this story). Don't forget to review at the end. Enjoy!**

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><p>Chapter 2<p>

1998

"Pretty lil' girl. She keeps screaming. But come nightfall the screams will stop. You can't scream if your lungs will take no air." Drusilla walked by the woman that she had tied up. "Spike will be home soon," she whispered into the lady's ear. "Tasty little snack you'll be."

The woman squirmed. Drusilla slapped her. "Stay still. Be a pretty lil' portrait."

Drusilla had a heighten sense of hearing and listened as Spike took out his keys and placed them through the keyhole. "Mumsy's little boy's home. And I think he's hungry."

Spike opened the door and walked into the apartment that he and his girlfriend Drusilla shared. The girl that was tied up let out a huge, glass breaking scream. Drusilla slapped her. "Bite your tongue!"

Spike dropped the bag of groceries he was carrying and ran over to the girl. "Dru!" he said, "What have you done."

"I brought us dinner. Want a taste?"

"Dinner?" Spike said. "Those groceries are dinner." He pointed at the bag. Then he placed a hand on the scared woman's shoulder. "This lady is a person. Not dinner!"

Spike attempted to untie the girl but Drusilla pushed him away. She was stronger than she looked. "Bad Spikey." While Spike was on the ground Drusilla came close to the girl. She moan in anticipation of what she was about to do. The girl screamed again, but that time it has a musically effect on Dru. She began to sway back and forth to the music of the screams.

Spike, who had hit his head, began to get up. He was dizzy but a girl was screaming. Then he remembered what was happening. Dru was having an episode and the girl was scared. He knew his Drusilla would never hurt a fly, it was all make believe to her, but the tied up woman did not know that.

He got up just in time to see Dru nuzzling on the woman's neck. He walked over to Dru, ready to take her off when he noticed the woman's head slump. She had stopped screaming. Panicked, Spike pulled Drusilla off of the woman. There was a large gaping hole with blood pouring out of it in the middle of the woman's neck. "Dru!" Spike said.

He pulled his shirt off and tried to stop the bleeding, but it was no use, the woman was losing too much blood. "Call 9-1-1, Dru!" he shouted. He hoped she would break out of her psychotic trance just in time."

"Forget about the girl. I'll find you a new one for you to snack on," Drusilla said.

"You killed her, Dru!" Spike yelled, "This isn't a game or make believe. She is going to die unless she gets help right now. Hell, she'll probably die anyway."

"Spike," Drusilla said calmly but confused, "why are you so upset? I thought you'd be proud."

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><p><strong>Author Note: Just a reminder to review :p<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry it took so long to update. Band camp was way more stressful than anticipated and then some horrible, horrible things went down and I had no time for my computer which sucked because writing is my destressor. Anyway, here's chapter 3, and I'm going to give you all a little treat, I'll be updating chapter 4 today too for sticking with me despite my week long absence. **

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><p>Chapter 3<p>

2002

"Hey, Buffy," Dawn said after returning from school. Buffy was just staring into space while lounging on her couch when younger sister and legal responsibility called out her name and returned her to this plane.

"Huh?" she asked, in a daze. She used her hands to spring herself upright and made eye contact with her sister.

"Just saying hi. I'm home from school. So, where has Spike been? I haven't seen him in a few days." Dawn was at a friend's house when Spike was arrested. She had no idea about what happened.

A little glare shined in Buffy's eyes. "Don't call him that," she said.

"What, Spike? But that's his name. What should I call him."

"How about William; his real name?" Buffy said while crossing her arms.

Dawn laughed, "You only do that because you two are all intimate and stuff."

Buffy continued to glare.

"Come on, I'm not twelve. I know what you to do. He does practically life here. Do you expect me to believe he's just braiding you hair and painting his nails when he sleeps over. Okay, maybe the last one's true, but come on, I'm sixteen. I know what you two do."

"Go to your room, Dawn."

"For what? Being worldly?"

"Don't argue with me!" Buffy shouted. She took a deep breath to calm herself down. "Just go up there. I'll be there soon. We need to talk about something."

Dawn didn't talk back. Normally she would have but she must have sensed something was wrong and for once she listened to logic instead of her emotions and went upstairs, waiting for her sister to come talk to her.

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><p>"Spike, a killer?" Willow asked. She was leaning against the island counter in the middle of Buffy's kitchen with her two best friends, Buffy and Xander, sitting on stools on the other side. "I mean, I know he pretends to be all bad and stuff, but just 'hey look at me I'm smoking and wearing black nail polish' kind of bad."<p>

"I found these," Buffy said. Buffy dug into her purse and pulled out some medication. "I'm not sure what they are but…I don't know, maybe they sent him into some sort of psychotic episode or something."

Willow took the pill bottle and examined it. She had been struggling with a drug addiction recently and perhaps she would know what the drug was. "Buffy, these are an anti-psychotic."

"If a sane person took them could they end up having an episode, right?" Buffy asked.

"Maybe," Willow said. Even though she had been addicted she wasn't an expert on drugs. "But Buffy, these are prescribed to Spike. And they're a few month old. It looks as if Spike went _off_ his medication and that's what sent him into a psychotic episode."

"No," Buffy said, "If Spike was crazy he would have told me."

"Really?" Xander asked, "And you would have accepted him even after what his ex-girlfriend did?"

"He's not like Drusilla!" Buffy yelled. She got off of the stool and walked over to the window, looking out at it. "Oh, God, poor William," she cried as she placed a hand on her heart. Xander stood by her side and squeezed her shoulder comfortingly. "He's going to be okay, right?" she asked Xander, "Oh, God, please tell me he's going to be okay." Then she fell into Xander's arms crying.

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><p><strong>AN: Okay, so my inner editors was like, screw you, and wouldn't do much for me so I apologize if that sucked but this site isn't exactly known for it's Great American Novels so I hope that chapter was at least enjoyable. If my errors are really screwing with you head that much and you're going to be one of those people (I love those people!) then you can send me in a list of edits that I'll eventually get around to fixing. Hell, I use fanfiction as a tool to improve my writing, I love reviews and the more in depth and critical (but no flames) the better. So please send me a review and I'll be as happy as a clam. Chapter 4 will be up shortly.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: As promised here your treat: Chapter 4**

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><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

**1994-1997**

"Look, kid," the middle aged English police officer said as he sat across the table from Spike, "this is only a small vandalism charge." Spike was in an interrogation room, his hands free, after his arrest. He had been nailing spikes into the wall of his apartment and his neighbor and landlord had call the cops about this.

"I know you want the freedom to decorate your place as you please, but you live in an apartment. Those spikes went right through the wall and the little girl next door cut her arm. It could have been a lot worst. Those things are dangerous."

Spike leaned back in his hair. He was wearing all black and what he considered to be his signature duster. "I know spikes can be dangerous, just ask the girls I nailed them through." He began to laugh manically.

The officer stood up and reached for his gun. "That's not something to joke about!"

"Who's joking?

The police spent months looking for the girls that Spike had confessed to nailing and murdering. They never found them. He was sentenced to an institution in England where he spent the next three years. Halfway through his rehabilitation Spike had a break through. He sat in his cell and cried.

"William," the kind doctor who treated him said, "Are you read to tell us where the girls are." The doctor must had thought Spike was crying because of regret.

Spike looked up. His stay at the institution had left him looking horribly. His bleached hair had grown out and there was not an inch of black clothing covering him. "There are no bloody girls," Spike said. It made sense. Spike had thought he had nailed the girls to his own wall. He never said he disposed of any bodies. He said they were still there. There were no girls because he had just made them up in his mind.

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><p>Spike walked into the common room. A skinny woman with long black hair sat on one of the couches. She was staring at the ceiling. "I'm naming all the star," she said as Spike sat down next to her.<p>

"You can't see the stars, Luv," Spike pointed out, "That's the ceiling. Also, it's day."

"I can see them," she insisted, "But I've named them all the same thing, and there's terrible confusion."

Spike had already returned from his psychotic episode and the loonies he was stuck with were really starting to get to him. He smashed his head into his palm and waited out the days until he would be released.

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><p>Spike fell in love with the crazy girl in the asylum. The way she saw things was so surreal to him. It was as if she was hyper sane instead of insane. Her name was Drusilla and when Spike was realized he was in love with her he decided he would wait for her. His wait ended shortly when he agreed to take care of her and she was released into his custody half a year later.<p>

Spike never knew why she was put in the asylum but he knew she had been there for many more years than he was. He could tell she was a few card short of a deck but that didn't matter because they were madly in love.

Drusilla took to calling him Spike, as if she knew what he had thought he done despite him never telling her. At first he hated the nickname, it tugged as his heart every time she spoke it, but soon it grew on him. She helped him learn to stop caring about all his regrets and to just move on and start over his new life with her. They were in love and he knew if anything ever happened to her he wouldn't be able to go on.

He waited for her, in England, and when she was released he decided to take her to America to leave their pasts behind. There was nothing for them there, anyway, neither had any family. The only thing England had for them was sad memories that neither wanted to keep.

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><p><strong>AN: Okay, so I know I'm horrible as flashbacks but I really wanted to included Spikes past. This is my last flashback piece so from now on it'll be chronological. Anyway, Review Time (please!)  
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	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sorry that I didn't update yesterday. College started this week and I have a TON of classes on Tuesday and Thursdays, plus I had an article for the school paper to write plus I had homework. But I'm updating today (yay!). Also we're half way done with this fic. Will Spike ever be able to live a normal life with his beloved Buffy? Will Buffy be able to cope with these horrific events? Keep reading to find out! :D**

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><p>Chapter 5<p>

2002

"They said you'd probably be more comfortable with a doctor who already knew you," Liam said as Spike was place in front of him. Spike was still in a strait jacket.

"Oh, this is rich. Psychiatry from the ultimate killer," Spike said.

Liam raised an eyebrow, trying to follow Spike's logic. Liam had once worked at the Sunnydale Asylum, but he left because the psycos in there were starting to get to him. They started affecting his relationship with his girlfriend so he quit and moved his practice to L.A. It wasn't too far and he had hoped the move would have saved his relationship, but after a series of mistakes on Liam's part, including cheating on girlfriend while she was in a coma about a year ago, his girlfriend, Buffy, still ended up breaking up with him. Then she started dating a new patient of his, Spike.

At first Spike and Buffy were just friends, but over the past few months they had become closer, and Spike had become more closed off. Spike ended up leaving Liam's practice. He assumed Spike had started seeing another doctor, but apparently not. Spike had stopped taking his medication and had a psychotic episode. This time, though, he had actually killed someone.

He had bit a young girl's neck, a few girls actually, and drained their necks of blood but only after he tortured them for a little while by stabbing them with metal spikes. It was similar to what his his ex-girlfriend, Drusilla, did a few years before.

Spike had done the crimes in cemetery. The reason he was caught was because of his record. Nothing else except the DNA of his saliva had attached him to the crime.

Apparently Spike thought he was a vampire. Liam did not plan to stay involved on Spike's case for long, but Spike's new doctors thought, at least for the mean time, it would be good to have someone Spike was familiar with.

"They told me you think you're a vampire," Liam said.

"I am!" Spike yelled. He sighed, rolled his eyes and rolled his lips into a sneer. "And so are you, Angel."

"I'm flattered, really, but I've never been one pet names," Liam taunted. He really did not want to be a part of this case.

"Careful," Spike spat back, "I bite."

Liam sighed. "Why'd you go off your meds?" he asked.

"What bloody meds?" Spike yelled. His emotions were wild.

"The ones I prescribed you."

"Really? You want me to believe you're my doctor. I get that you've got your delusions of grandeur, mate, but being a doctor is really pushing it."

"Now you're analyzing me?" Liam questioned.

Days went by while a multitude of doctors tried to figure out Spike. Meanwhile the doctors were shoving pills down his throat. At first they had to be forced into him through an IV, but Spike soon grew tired fighting and swallowed pills willingly. But the more pills he took the more confused he got.

Liam assumed the the reason Spike was taking the pills willingly was because they were starting to take an effect. Some days he fully believed he was a vampire, others he started to believe the stories that the doctors told him. Spike once said to Liam that the only thing he knew for sure was that he wanted to see Buffy again.

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><p>"They won't let me see him," Buffy said, holding back tears. She laid her head in Willow's lap and was surrounded by her friends inside her living room. Buffy and Willow were on the floor, facing the couch where Xander and his fiancée Anya sat. Buffy would not let her sister listen in to their discussions about Spike.<p>

"Well Buffy, he's a psychotic killer," Xander said.

"But he wouldn't hurt me. He loves me." Buffy sat up, taking her head off of Willow's lap. "I just want to see him. To hold is hand. Tell him that I still love him."

Anya sighed, "I hate the way men make some woman go crazy. You know what Buffy, men are the scum of the Earth—"

"Hey!" Xander interrupted.

"Well, not you Honey," Anya turned attention back to the point she was making, "Willow's got the right idea though," Anya said referring to the fact that Willow as gay.

"Hello, fiancé sitting right here!" Xander interjected.

"Shh Honey, we're having girl talk!" Anya seemed more excited and happy than the morbidness of her words would have one believe.

"Yeah, but I didn't choose to become a lesbian," Willow said, "Kind of just happened. And hey, it's not exactly happy fun time over here in Lesbian-World. Maybe you forgot but Tara and I just broke up."

"But that's because you got into drugs and stuff. Spike's got the opposite problem, he's not into drugs. But he should be. I guess in the straight-world drugs are good. Hey Honey," Anya said, turning to Xander, "Can we have some drugs?"

"Um…Anya, I don't think that's appropriate," Xander said. He looked at his best friend, giving her puppy dogs eyes, asking for forgiveness from Anya.

"Why not?" Anya asked, "Spike gets drugs!"

"Spike gets prescribed drugs," Xander said. "Taking drugs just for fun isn't good though."

"Cause then we'll end up like Willow?"

Xander tried to keep smiling but the room had become too uncomfortable.

"I'm going to go guys," Willow said.

"Please don't," said Xander, "You know what, we'll go." Xander didn't want to make Willow feel like she was being kicked out of her own house. She had moved in with Buffy and Dawn a few months back. It was after Buffy and Dawn's mother passed away, leaving Buffy as Dawn guardian and then Buffy was injured and entered a coma. Willow and her now ex girlfriend moved in to take care of Dawn and Willow didn't leave even after Buffy recovered.

Willow gave a look of thanks to Xander as he and his fiancée left.

Willow and Buffy made their way into the kitchen and Willow poured them both some iced tea. "You okay?" Willow asked.

"When I came out of my coma he was right there, the first person I saw." Buffy had entered the coma during a structural collapse while visiting Xander at work. Xander was a construction worker and the supervisor had cut corners. Luckily for Xander he missed the debris by a few feet. But Buffy was lucky to have even survived. "He was there for me during my recovery. He wasn't even my boyfriend at the time and he was still willing to do anything for me. He helped you guys take care of Dawn. He became a part of this family. I love him.

"You know, I never asked him why he saw Liam. I always thought, hey this guy wears a lot of black, probably depressed. And you know Liam, he would never break doctor-patient confidentiality, but he did tell me to be careful. It just gave William an air of mystery, though."

"Do you know why he goes by Spike?" Willow asked.

Buffy shook her head.

"It's…it's just that the way he killed those girls…he drove spikes through him."

Buffy gave Willow a look as if to tell her to stop talking and Willow obeyed. She didn't want to upset Buffy further. "I don't care what they say he did," Buffy said at last, "I just want to see him again."

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><p><strong>AN: I hope you liked. I really had some fun writing Anya's dialogue (she's one of my favorite characters) and I'm a little sad that I didn't write more for her but I think writing just for the fun of it would destroy this fic. Maybe I'll write an Anya-centered fanfic one day and perhaps I'll have Drusilla in it two, since she's another great character for write for. Oh, and Andrew. Would you read that? Maybe a slash between Dru and Anya while Andrew sits in the corner of the room complaining about how icky girls are and day dreams about Spike instead. Yeah, that fic would be awesome.  
><strong>

**Now please review! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: This is an ultra short chapter, but I'm okay with that because chapter 5 was ultra long and also you should all be proud of me for actually updating two days in a row. :D Btw, half of the writing is this chapter is an author note at the end that discusses my Buffy and fanfiction philosophy. You might find it interesting or you might just skip to the review button. Whatever floats your boat.  
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><p>Chapter 6<p>

2002

Spike was brought back into Liam's temporary office. "You should be happy to know this'll be our last session," Angel said. "I'm getting nowhere with you so I'm going to return to L.A."

"I'll do whatever it takes," Spike said. His eye were getting moist but he was not crying. The pills were messing with his emotions. He didn't know whether he was sad or angry and they flip-flopped like crazy. "Just make it so I can see Buffy again."

Liam cringed. Perhaps the mention of Buffy had gotten to him. "Look, I don't know if that's a possibly. You're going to be here for a long time. You killed people."

"Please," Spike pleaded.

Liam sighed. "You're never going to be released," he said while standing. "I wish I could give you hope, but it's wrong to give you false hope. You're never going to see Buffy again."

Spike watched Liam intensely. He saw Liam's mouth twitch. Was he happy about that? Did he not want Spike to have a breakthrough and get better. Spike was still in a straightjacket, but normally he would have tried to attack Liam anyway. But not today. He sat there. There were no violent tendencies or wishes. He just wanted to see Buffy.

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><p>"I'm going back to L.A," Liam said to Buffy when they met for coffee. They sat in a booth across from each other.<p>

"You can't give up on William," Buffy said.

"I also can't talk about this."

"I know it's hard but—"

"No," Liam interrupted, "I mean I legally can't talk about this."

Buffy sighed and took a sip of her coffee. "You mean you won't."

"Buffy, don't try to convince me to break the law."

"He's my boyfriend, Liam. I love him, just like I loved you. If you were in trouble I would have been there for you, not that you were ever there for me. But now William's in trouble. He was there for me when my mom died. He stayed by my bedside when I was in my coma and you were out with that whore. If you ever want to make up for what you did to him then let me be there for him."

"No, Buffy. Look, I legally can't say anything, but I'm going to say this anyway. Forget about him. He's hopeless. Find a man who can be there for you, not a crazy lunatic who's behind bars."

"He's already been there for me," Buffy sneered.

"I still love you, Buffy," Angel said, "and I want you to be happy. I want you to find someone who will make you happy."

"William make's me happy."

"Really? Then why are you so miserable right now?

Buffy stood up with her coffee in her hand. She took a deep breath while thinking about what she was about to say. "You know what? Screw you. I'm glad you're going back to L.A. You wouldn't help him anyway. You're the whole reason this probably happened. You weren't a good enough doctor. You weren't there for your patient. You just let him go without giving him a second chance. And why? Because you were jealous. You secretly wanted this to happen!"

"Buffy," Liam tried to plead with Buffy's common scenes.

"'Bugger off'" Buffy said with a mock English accent. She tipped her coffee upside down and poured it on Liam's lap. He screamed out in pain. Buffy smirked and walk away. No one was going to keep her away from Spike.

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><p><strong>AN: That last paragraph was really fun to write. I was cracking while I did it. :p I want to note here that I'm not anti-Angel. I love Angel, in fact, I think that canon-Buffy and canon-Angel belong together. I have a very interesting view on the Buffy/Angel/Spike relation and if you care you can read below, if not, then just review. Oh, and below I have some spoilers from the TV series because I'm referencing examples.  
><strong>

**I believe that Buffy and Angel are soulmates but despite this not everything always work out for them. They'll eventually end up together, just not yet. When Buffy and Spike were together it was because it was what they both needed at the time. Buffy needed Spike, the bad boyfriend, to get over Riley and the whole being pulled out of Heaven thing. Spike needed Buffy to get over Dru (I also love Spike/Dru). But it was a time in their lives where they were both hitting rockbottom and needed the comfort of another's touch. And then Spike got his soul back, and while his romantic relationship with Buffy ended a more important friendship sprang forth which help him heal and become one of the good guys. Now just because I believe Buffy and Spike are kindred souls, not soulmates, doesn't mean I can't have a little Spuffy fun (they are the sexy couple on the show).**

**Also, the reason I decided to make Angel such an ass and Spike's antagonist in this is because that's how their relationship is. I was not able to show the softer sides of their relationship, but another fic I'm working on does just that. **

**The thing I love about Buffy is it has these great relationships that I love to explore with my fanficion. Change a few events, even change reality like I did in this fic and then you can challenge the characterizations even further.  
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**So that's part of my philosophy. I hope reading that gave you greater understand into my mind and you'll know why I enjoy fanfiction so much. Maybe you'll even ask yourself why you love fanficion so much and you'll learn a little more about yourself. **

**Now please review :D**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

2002

Buffy sat on her couch while reading through some of Spike's poetry. It was God awful but comforting at the same time. Some of the poems were really depressing but others were cheesy and full of love. They all brought a smile to Buffy's face.

The phone rang and Buffy ignored it while Dawn picked up. "Hello…oh my God, is it really you…how are you…oh…that sucks…yeah, yeah, she's right here!" Dawn lifted the phone from her ear and called Buffy over. "Buffy, phone."

"Take a message," Buffy said absentmindedly.

"It's Spike!" she said.

Buffy looked up with her eyes wide. She tossed the notebook aside and raced to reach the phone. "William?" she asked.

"Yeah, Pet, it's me."

"Oh my God, is it really you?"

"Funny, that's the same thing your sis said."

"William, I, I, I don't know what to say."

"Funny thing is me too. All I've been thinking about is getting a chance to talk to you and now I have no idea what to say."

"How much time to you have to talk?" she asked.

"Five minutes. I'd say 'bout four by now."

There was silence for a few seconds. "God, we are we wasting this precious time!" They both laughed. Then there was silence again. "William," she finally said, "I don't want to the conversation to turn all bad and stuff—"

"Then don't," Spike said.

"But there are some things we need to talk about."

"I know," Spike admitted, "And we'll talk. Just, not today."

"Will we get another chance? How long will I have to wait to hear you talk again?"

"A week," Spike admitted, "But please, let's not do this today. I know what I've done. I know you probably hate me."

"No, William, I could never hate you."

"That's good. That's what I need to hear. I don't know if I can get through this, Pet. I need your strength and your luv. I need to know that you'll be here for me, if only in spirit."

Buffy was silent.

"Pet?"

"I'm sorry Spike."

"No, I get it. You'll always love me, but you can't forgive me."

"It's not even that. It's just there's a lot we need to talk about. I'm not the girlfriend who's just going to sit around while her boyfriend's jail."

"Technically I'm in an institution," Spike corrected.

"This is no time for jokes, William. I'll be there for you, but in our next phone call we're going to have to talk. Not just all this lovey-dovey stuff. We need to have a serious talk."

"We will. But we only have a few minutes left. So tell me, how have you been holding up?"

"I want to give you hope so I won't answer that honestly. I'm perfect fine, though I do miss you. I'm confident I'll see you soon that that's what's keeping me together."

"And the real story is?"

"I poured a cup of java on Liam."

"That's my girl!"

They laughed again. "I got to go Buffy."

"So soon, but we just started talking."

"I know. But it was enough. It'll get me through this week."

"I'll wait by the phone."

"Please don't. Next Sunday at oneish is when I'll call."

"Alright, I love you."

"You too, Luv." Then there was a click.

Buffy looked over at Dawn who had been watching the whole phone call. "So?" Dawn asked.

Buffy stared at Dawn blankly. "I have absolutely no idea."

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><p><strong>AN: Review please! :D  
><strong>


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Buffy was led by a guard down a hallway. Upon entering the asylum Buffy had her things collected and was checked for illegal items. When she was cleared she was led the office of Dr. Welsh. The guard opened the door and left Buffy with the doctor.

"Hello, Ms. Summers, please have a seat." Buffy listened to the directions and sat down across from the doctor. Dr. Welsh was filling out some paperwork. She finally looked to give Buffy and fake smile, trying to be comforting. Dr. Welsh didn't seem to have great bedside manner. "My name is Dr. Maggie Welsh. I'm head of phycology here."

"And you're going to tell me about how William's doing?" Buffy asked.

"He's coming along just fine. He's no longer forced to wear a straightjacket. The violence has been tamed. He's improved vastly since the medication has entered his system. All he can talk about is seeing you again. We thought having the familiarly of his former psychologist would help him, but it hasn't. It seems the thing that keeps him going is you. I thought it might be good for him to see you."

"You're going to let me see William?" Buffy asked. Her heart was throbbing. She wasn't expecting that. She had just spoken to him for the first time since his arrest last week and now she was going to see him. It all felt so long ago.

"Yes. He'll be in here in a few minutes. I asked him yesterday, before I called you, if he would like to see you."

Buffy felt like she was going to cry, but from happiness. The door behind Buffy opened. She turned to see Spike. He looked so different. His roots had grown in he had traded his is all black and leather for a starch white patient uniform. His Adam's Apple bounced and he stared at Buffy in disbelieve.

Buffy turned to Maggie and she gave her a nod. Buffy stood up and walked over to Spike and gave him a soft hug. He was shaking. But he wrapped his arms around her and excepted her.

"I love you," she said, "so much."

"I know." His voice was shaky.

The armed guard behind Spike walked him over to one of the chairs and Buffy sat in the other one. Dr. Welsh gave him a nod and the guard left. "I didn't believe you doc," Spike said. He looked at her. "But thank you."

"Ms. Summers…can I call you Buffy."

"Sure," Buffy said without turning to look. She couldn't take her eyes off Spike.

"Buffy, William said in our last session that there were a lot of things you two needed to talk about."

"How's Dawn doing?" Spike asked.

"That's not what she's referring to," Buffy said.

"I know," Spike admitted, "But I still want to know how everyone's doing."

"After we talk, okay? I mean, technically we'll still be talking, but after we talk about the stuff we need to talk about. Okay, now talk."

Spike smirked. "I've always loved you Summers. Always will."

"William."

"I'm not going to blame you. It's just you made me feel so complete. So whole. I went off the meds and you became my supergirl. And then the evil inside me came out. I wasn't good enough for you. I was an evil soulless demon."

"A vampire?" Buffy questioned.

"I was sucking the life out of you. But no matter what I still felt dead inside." Spike averted his gaze from Buffy. He didn't want her to look at him while he said his next few words, but he could feel her eyes on him. He looked at the floor. "Killing those girls feels like a dream now."

"That's good," Buffy said. She put her had on his shoulder.

"No, it's not. I can't regret something that doesn't feel real. It's like I'm stuck between realities and I don't know what's real. The only thing I know is that I want you. That I love you. That I need you. But I can't have you here, because I'm locked up. And I can't have you there because I'm a monster. And you deserve so much better."

Buffy reached over and pulled Spike's head toward her, forcing him to look at her. "I don't care what reality you're stuck in. I'll love you no matter where you go." She pulled his face closer and gave him a kiss on the lips.

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><p><strong>AN: Aw, Buffy and Spike have been reunited, how adorable. REVIEW TIME! :D**


	9. Epilogue

**A/N: Okay, this is an unbelievable short chapter but I think it's a cute ending to the story. I hope you enjoyed my story. Look out for my next stories:**

**_Love_ is an Human AU about a teenage Spike attending Sunnydale High (it's a Spuffy). It explores his AU relationship with characters, including his mother, Drusilla, Xander, Willow, Harmony, Buffy, Darla, Angel and more. I am probably going to write a similar but less structured story about Spike's canon relationships too!  
><strong>

**_Humanity _is set in season 2 with the spin that Spike and Drusilla have been cursed and turned into human. A newly human Spike struggles to take care of his insane girlfriend and deal with his immense guilt all while living on the Hellmouth.**

**_Untitled _is Vamp-Xander and Vamp-Willow's backstory in the wishverse. **

**Titles are subject to changes (especially that last one :p).  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Epilogue<strong>

**2006**

Spike was locked up in an asylum for four years. He had murdered a couple girls, drained their blood by impaling them with spikes and biting their neck. He had gone into a psychotic episode. He had been brought back through it. He had become suicidal. And through it all Buffy never stopped loving him.

Four years after his arrest he was released. Waiting for him at the gates was Buffy. He was given back his black and leather clothes and given a hug by his ever loyal girlfriend. Hand in hand they walked out of the asylum. Spike paused behind the front door. Daylight was in front of him. Even we he was allowed to he had always avoided going outside since he entered the asylum. It had been years since he'd felt the rays of sun on his skin.

He opened the door and walked into the light. He stood there in the sun for a few minutes, with Buffy silent by his side. Buffy, who was still holding his hand, pulled him forward. "Just a few more minutes, pet?" he said.

"You're so white now," Buffy said. "You're going to burn."

Spike gave him. He let Buffy drive him back to her house. She opened the door of the house and waiting in the living room were all their friends were. Dawn was the first person Spike noticed, mainly because she ran right to him and gave him a hug. She had gotten much older. She was twenty and in college.

Spike surveyed the room. Tara and Anya were missing. It didn't surprise Spike. He had been told that they had both died. It still broke his heart, though.

Next Spike got a hug from Willow and then a handshake from Xander.

"Now I know we all want to catch up with William," Buffy said, "But you're just going to have to wait a little longer." She took Spike's hand and led him up the stairs. She led him to her bedroom. They really did have a lot to catch up on some things.

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><p><strong>AN: So that's my first Spuffy and first AU. I hope you enjoyed it. Please review and let me know what you thought of the story. Even if you haven't reviewed once yet please just let me know what you liked about this story and what you think I could've done better. I really want to improve so I can bring you better stories in the future. Thanks for reading!**


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